You Don't Know It's There 'Till It's Gone
by The Holy Knight
Summary: A girl has joined Varia,her past is unknown.No one in the Varia understands the pain she's been through.She's now the maid of Varia.What would happen if one day she decides to leave?What would the group do? Please read and review!TYL!Xanxus/TYL!OC
1. The Beginning

**_Hello Readers!This is my first story so go easy with the reviews!  
There might be some mistakes or missing words...fanfiction is being stupid to me..-_-''  
I don't own anything,except my OCs!_**

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_Drip,drop,drip drop_

The rain was pouring buckets outside the Varia Headquaters,Nezumi was sitting on the window sill of her bedroom window,watching the droplets of water,shattering to ground,the blacked haired then stood up,walked towards the door,and down the narrow hallway,singing a tune silently to herself as she walked.

_Its a sad story._

_I can't forget that uncommon day when the bright sun is filling_

_I dreamed endlessly on this beautiful day_

_The tears that I don't desire, please come find me_

_The way you spoke from your painfully cold lips_

_Shuts out all light_

_Even though the wind passes by leaving nothing, _

_I lose strength and cry_

_Cause you're breakin' my heart_

She came up to a brown wooden door and put her hand on the golden coloured door knob when she heard a yell.

"VVOOIII!"

The base shook,she opened the door to see a man with silver,white long hair,pointing his sharp blade at a short blond with peek-a-boo bangs.

"VVVVOOOIII!Why the hell would you watch this shit,Bel?"yelled the older man.

"Ushishishi,'cause the prince wants to,"respond Bel.

The arguement continued with non-stop swearing from white haired man and laughing and knives being thrown from one side to the other._Soon enough this is gonna break out into a fight,wait…it already has._Thought Nezumi,shaking her head,the female walked into the room and sat down onto the royal red couch,and took the remote and flipped the channel while the two members were busy.

"Zumi-Chan!Can you come here for a tinny moment!I want you to try on this dress I bought for you!

A musical voice filled the room .A sort of bald man,with a red mohawk and green hair hanging onto the side..came skipping into the room with a white and black dress in his held it over his head to let the group see.

"Nani(1)?Lussuria?"Nezumi turned,her chocolate brown eyes glimmering with boredom.

"I want you to try this!Pretty please?"Lussuria shoved the dress into Nezumi's arms.

"I'll do it later,put it in my room."said Nezumi pushing the dress back towards him.

"B-but...!"

"VOI!Nezumi!When are you gonna make dinner!I'm starving!"yelled Squalo,stomping towards her.

"Ushishishishi,the Prince is also hungry,can you make dinner,princess?"asked Bel playing with several knives.

"Wait,where's Boss?"asked Lussuria with a smile.

"He's in his office,probably.I'll go see,"Nezumi stood from the couch and headed out the hallway was empty and continued singing the same tune as before quietly to herself.

_I can not breathe_

_I won't be healed_

_I want to see what I was_

_I must be blind _

_I want to get back to that light_

_How should I know rain comes again_

_Tell me why you're leaving me again_

_Please don't go stay here however come back to me~_

She stopped singing when she met Xanxus' office door,knocked three times and waited.A deep voice came from the other side telling her to come in,she then opened door the door ,with a small quiet "Excuse me," and stepped in.

"Bossu, are you hungry?"She asked with a cheery voice full of sarcasm.

"Of course,kasu!"replied the scarred boss,sitting in his thrown like chair with a glass of red wine in his hand,she stood there glaring at her boss,not responding a single word,then turned around and left the room.

Several Hours After Dinner

The rain continued to fall,making the day even worst,Everyone had full stomachs and then went to do whatever they wanted. Nezumi finished washing the dishes and the rest of her chores and headed off to her room,where she could not be disturbed,she opened her bedroom door and layed in her bed,looking up at the white ceiling and listening to the shattering rain,thunder filled the sky with a dark,grey cloud. Nezumi turned her head toward her night stand and looked at her clock. She rolled off her bed and headed towards her desk near the closet,with her lacey,navy blue curtins hanging miserbly and sat 's desk were pieces of music sheets scattered on the desklike a tornado had come through it,along with crumpled balls of paper,she reached for the pieces of music,organised them and headed out down a stopped at a brown door,and opened brown eyed female sat down near the grand piano,put the musical sheets of paper into the stand,started the metronome,and began playing of the piano,the melody echoed in the empty room,bouncing in and out of the room,while playing the piano she began to sing a melody,that was beautiful. While outside the room,Xanxus was passing by the room when he heard stopped walking and leaned against the door and listened carefully to the melody and recognized the voice(seeing that it was female and not male).Before the melody ended he entered the room.

Nezumi didn't notice that Xanxus had snuck in until she heard him speak.

"Oi,what are you doing in here,kasu?" She turned around and stared at her looked away sadly at the keyboard.

"..."

She didn't meet his ruby red eyes that glared at her.

"Hmph,"He turned around and left the room leaving the fragile little wolf to herself.

Nezumi stared at the sheets of paper,her eyes burned,the tears wanting to fall but she didn't allow them,her midnight black hair covered her eyes,she's been in the Varia for about a year and they just believe that she was a girl with absolutely no skills whatsoever in combat,so she was put as a maid

_Why?_

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(1)Nani=What

Kasu=trash

Please review!


	2. Missing

_Run,"That's what he told her."Run as fast as you can!"She ran as fast as her small feet could take didn't look wanting to vision was starting to blur from the blood dripping from her left eye.A shadow appeared behind footsteps pounded against the looked back without stopping watching the shadow come closer every took a left turn and smashed against a stood up and wanting to fell out of her eyes."Please,stop."The shadow came shut her came closer and opened it sharp teeth drool slid out of its teeth and onto the pounced forward towards !A gush of red liquid spread in the air and fell to the ground. _

Nezumi shot up into a sitting dripping from her pale skin,brown eyes sprouted with tears, hugged her knees and sobbed,no one around to comfort her,in her time in need.

The next morning,she woke up around 6:30,rolled out of bed and headed towards the bathroom,when she came out,she got dressed and headed out the door and into the kitchen and began starting on making breakfast.

Around 8 to 9 o'clock the Varia gang headed into the kitchen and began eating.

"VOI!That was mine!"yelled Squalo screaming at Fran.

"But,you said I could have it Squalo-Taicho."replied Fran in a sarcastic voice.

"You freakin' liar!" Squalo then pounced on Fran and began to fight.

"Ushishishi,looks like the shark wants to eat the frog,"said his Bel knives at the back of Fran's hood/hat.

"Bel-Senpai!Can you please stop throwing your knives at me?"Fran said while being pinned to the ground by Squalo,ready to kill him.

"There are always fights in the morning..right,boss?"said Levi eating his breakfast,her then turned to the Varia boss,waiting for an answer.

The Varia boss said nothing and continued to eat his breakfast,in corner of his eye he could see Nezumi washing the dishes with a sorrowful face,he looked away and took a sip of his wine.

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White cotton balls fell from the sky and landed on Nezumi's palm,she watched it melt away into water,the weather was cold and windy but she didn't mind that,the snow always made her enjoyed doing stuff that little children do,make snowmen,have snowball fights,make snow angels,and the other fun activities,she hasn't done that in while since the incident.A small smile crept onto her,but it quickly faded away.

_I don't want to stay here. _

She looked up at the grey clouds,watching the little flakes of snow sighed.

_"Uncle!Uncle!Looky!I made a snowman!"said a little girl,putting her scarf to the snowman._

_Her uncle laughed and walked towards her."He's very handsome Nezumi,"He took off his scarf and put it around her,she giggled and turned to her uncle with a snowball in her hand and chucked it in his face and ran._

_"Hey!"Nezumi's uncle began chasing the little girl with a snowball._

Nezumi reached into her pocket and took out a small necklace that he gave her,it was a ring that hung a sliver ring had a snowflake,on the ring read the date July 2,1985.

"Time passes by so fast,"Nezumi said to herself.

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Nezumi was in Xanxus' office cleaning the left over pieces of glass that was thrown at Squalo.

"VOI!What the hell did I do!"

Another wine glass was thrown at him.A pissed shark,walked towards Xanxus and started screaming and swearing continued to clean up the messes without a was like she wasn't there at she picked up another piece of glass when something made contact on the back of her head,her hair was soaked with red turned around to face the boss who didn't really care about what happend.A red orb appeared in the boss's palm and was thrown towards Squalo who was blown out of the room,creating a huge hole in the glanced at the wet haired female.

"Oi,what the fuck happened to you?"

Nezumi stared at Xanxus in sad looked away and spoke in a quiet voice.

"You accidently threw a wine glass at me,"

"What?Speak up bitch,"

"You threw a wine glass at me,"She stood up and looked at the black haired dripped from her midnight-blue boss had never aimed or intended to hurt her unless it was brown eyes looked away with hurt and walked out of the room.

She walked to her room,opened the door and fell on her bed,she stuffed her face into her pillow and let the waterfall of tears,she never wanted to join the mafia,or the life was hell since the became more stressed when she met the scarred wanted to start all over,to the time when her uncle looked up at her night raised her hand and reached up and took a picture frame,she flipped onto her back and stared at the were two people.A child and an adult were smiling and laughing with felt calmer,and she stood up and took out her bag and began stuffing her clothes into a bag.

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The next morning,there was no one in the kitchen making was no one cleaning,cooking,washing,and the other chores,it was very empty in the headquaters.

"Huh?Where's Zumi-chan?She's usually busy making breakfast by now,"Lussuria cocked his head to the right,his hands on the side of face.

"She's probably slacking off,"said Squalo slamming and shutting the kitchen cupboards.

"Ushishishi,the princess must have needed her beauty sleep."Bel opened the refridgerator and searched inside.

"Hey,I found cereal!"Fran took the cereal and ran out of the room.

"OI!"Everyone begab chasing Fran around the mansion.

Xanxus entered the kitchen where there was yelling and beating the shit out of eachother over cereal.

"Where's the stupid trash?"asked Xanxus sitting down on his "throne",having wine being poured into his glass by Levi.

"I'LL CHECK HER ROOM!"yelled Squalo stomping up the stairs.

When Squalo and the rest of the crew entered Nezumi's room there was no one in was no clothes,clocks,pictures,papers or anything.

"Where the did she go?"

**Yay I finished...took me forever to be pretty bad.**

**Another Happy Birthday to Kimberlyanna13 and also to my other friend Sydney! ^.^**

**Please review! ^.^ **


	3. Memories and Disasters

**Hello fellow readers!Sorry for not updating this story.. -_-'' It took a while for my writer's block to go away and dealing with school is making it harder to are coming up too..*sighs*Anyways,this chapter is kinda short too..****don't kill me ****Oh!And thank you for the wonderful comments and ideas that you have given me!I appreciate the feedback~**

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Nezumi drove her motorcycle down the dirt paved road and into the was about midnight and only a week since she left the Varia headquarters.

_I wonder what their doing_,wondered Nezumi.

But she shook those unwanted thoughts out of her mind and continued watch the trees run pass started to fall,little fluffs of cotton landed everywhere creating a wonderland around the female.

About 5 hours of the same scenery ,she came upon an grotesque looking gates were entwined with green leafs,and rusty walls surrounding the mansion her black and green moldy bricks that seem so fragile at the stared at the abandoned home with her brown eyes and push open the iron step she took in the snowy path,brought back a small,faint memories that seem so innocent.

"_He he!Uncle,stop that!You're tickling me!"The little girl giggled and tried to push away the older man.  
_

_"Ha ha..you're too cute too not tickle!"The uncle refused to listen to the girl and continued on._

_It was a sunny,bright day in the Kisaragi birds were singing happily as the flapped their wings in the servants were helping the house as they usually would,every now and then they would stop to look the uncle and his would smile and whisper amongst themselves with kind words._

_It was so innocent..._

As the memory started to fade from the black haired had not noticed the door in front of her and had accidentally ran into it.

"Ow.."she murmured under breath and rubbed her forehead.

Nezumi looked up to the wooden burnt put her hand on the door knob and tried to didn't then stepped back a couple steps,ran towards it and kicked then fell onto the white marble floor creating a loud thud,echoing inside the abandoned took a deep breathe and walked on forward into the empty abyss.

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**The Morning Nezumi Left**

"VVOOIIII!WHERE DID SHE GO!"Squalo started a angry fit,slashing and breaking everything in range of his sword while running around the HQ like a crazy marathon runner.

"The princess is probably playing hide-and-seek with the shi shi."The blond prince grinned manically as thoughts of searching for the maid appeared.

"Or she could be hiding from your face,you fallen prince.."said Fran under his breathe,looking away from Bel.

"What was that Fran?You wanted to play tag?Shi shi prince will gladly accept!"Bel then threw several knives at the illusionist.

" is never the answer!You need to use logic,but since you don't have any,I guess you could only use that one option!"explained Fran as he put his fist on top of his hand.

"Are you calling the prince stupid?"

"I never said that out loud senpai,"

"So you do!"

"OI(1)!BOTH OF YOU STOP FIGHTING OR I'LL TEAR OUT YOUR VOCAL CORDS AND FEED THEM TO THE BOSS!"yelled Squalo as he came back from his angry marathon.

"I don't think the boss likes to eat organs Squalo.."said Lussuria. "I think he prefers meat."

"THEN I'LL SKIN YOU BOTH ALIVE!"

A wine glass at that moment met with Squalo's shiny silver hair.

"VOI!WHAT DID YOU DO THAT FOR?"Squalo turned to face the scarred man,still sitting in his chair.

"You're too loud,trash."said Xanxus as he opened one of his eyes.

"..."

The silver haired captain then turned around and started to leave the kitchen while leaving a bunch of colourful words under his breath.

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**A four days after Nezumi left**

It was a beautiful day in Italy,the sun was shining,there was a small gust of wind that would dance with the trees,the snow would shine due to the light radiating from the ball of fire.

Now,if we look into the Varia HQ...it's not that peaceful.

"Bel-senpai!Please stop throwing your knives at me!It's very hard to run away from you when I can barely see the floor!"yelled Fran in his monotone voice as he desperately tried to run from the prince.

"The prince does not pity peasants!Go die already!"Bel threw another knife at the mist guardian only to accidentally miss and close to hitting the long haired captain.

"VOI!STOP PLAYING AROUND!THIS ISN'T A PLAY GROUND!"And so Squalo ended up joining Fran and Bel in the game of cat and mouse.

The mansion itself was barely holding halls were covered into dirt,blood,pieces of clothing that haven't been washed and unwanted food for mice to clean were filthy,bathrooms unclean and pests were started to infest the poor windows were shattered and walls and doors were broken into millions of pieces (that can't be put back together at all) because of the boss' temper issues and Squalo's angry rampages.

"Moe~All of you stop that!"exclaimed Lussuria as he was trying to do the there were too many clothes for him to wash by he tried stuffing it all into one machine only to create an explosion of water,bubbles and soapy then decided to give up and start cooking something before the boss got hungry.

The subordinates were panicking and rushing to repair the funiture,clean up at least all of the mess that was created to no was attempting to keep the boss happy and hoping that he wouldn't have to walk into the chaotic hallways they called far,the boss hadn't been paying attention to his surroundings outside his office,so he doesn't know about the whole had desperately trying to keep him in there until they could fix up the if the Xanxus saw what had happened to the mansion while Nezumi was gone...the headquarters wouldn't even be probably would have to rebuild it or find somewhere to stay until they find the maid.

Inside the office where Xanxus resides,the boss had a weird feeling inside of couldn't pin point the reason.

_It's probably something the trash made me eat..._thought Xanxus as he put his arm on the chair,holding up his head,ever since the black haired female went missing the tanned skin man had an empty it saddness?Anger?Or was something more?

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**Sorry for butchering some characters personalities and the horrible cliff hanger!*still has some writer's block*..heh..reviews would be appreciated!**


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